About

Tim Barnes

Tim Barnes is a twenty-­something man­-mountain; a proud Salopian who enjoys a tipple on Sunday. His jokes are well rounded just like his head, whilst his voice sits at the lower end of the frequency scale resulting, occasionally, in his trademark 'booming laugh'. Scientists have blamed this phenomenon for the great Shrewsbury tremor of 1996.

Sure, he's slightly overweight and looks a bit like the dad from The Wonder Years but don't let that put you off. Just sit back and allow yourself to be taken away by Tim's fantastical imagination and butter knife sharp wit.

Key feature
Eyebrows
Head size
NBA standard size 7 basketball
Melee weapon
Gammon shank
Finishing move
Queen to Rook five
Achievements
100% record for flipping Jaffa Cakes into own mouth

Simon Berry

Simon Berry is a long man, harboured within the depths of Shropshire, with verifiable claims of youth. His laughs erupt like distant shouts through a pillow, or a siren with a lisp. A crack team of scientists discovered that his attention to detail is borderline obsessive­-compulsive, but good comedy is what he does; don't dispute this for he will forsake you.

Instead of lateral thinking, he works on literal thinking, so fear not if he laughs at the normal things you say. Even though his chin protrudes and his hair is thinning, he makes your life a little bit better by speaking into your mind.

Super power
Horse mounting (at will)
Bravery
8
Battle cry
Patchachachoooey!
Finishing move
The Democratic Elbow
Soundtrack
Le Freak - Chic

When their forces combine, they become Tim and Simon; a comedy Megazord which can not, nay, will not be stopped...